As a paying parent, I religiously pay my child support in full and on time. However, because there is no accountability for the receiving parent, often I get asked to also pay additional amounts (outside the IRD system) for food, school fees etc. These additional payments are not taken into account when calculating my child support. This puts me as a liable parent in a difficult position - I want to ensure my children continue with the activities and lifestyle that they deserve so I end up giving into requests for additional money, only to hear that the child support was used on luxury beauty treatments etc for the receiving parent.
Do you agree with this comment?
I generally believe that most money paid is used well, but there is no rules around what the payments are used for.
When it comes to other costs, medical bills, medical insurance, school fees / trips / uniform / donations etc. it seems unfair that I pay a huge amount of my salary and then continue paying (comment edited by moderator).
I would prefer to see a more holistic approach taken that demonstrates not only the support payment but a total amount that supports the children.
this wouldnt work in my situation as I could see how the paying parent would use this system to consistently throw out and try and confuse all involved with child support calculations. It would end up becoming a competition to see who could pay what accounts first, and I would become increasingly stressed if the other parent kept switching names on accounts to try and receive bills first. My childrens father wouldnt even take them to the doctor while they were in his care and they would have to wait until they were back in my care for me to take them.
Yes; proportionate to share of care. So if a receiving CS parent is at 100% rate then they can take responsibility for the school fees etc. But if they are on 50% shared care then those compulsory parenting expenses should be shared equally or adjusted for. This will need to be defined, I suggest to all agreed costs including school fees, sports, and extra-curricular.
My ex husband and I had a "hand-shake" agreement, thus not written by our lawyers, that he pays for our child's education and medical bills on top of his child support payment. The reason for our divorce was that he was abusive and I got beaten up badly and this was his way of apologising.
But now he has a new partner and he may be able to claim these extra payment as part of child support. I am an immigrant without any family support as both of my parents have passed away and I work full-time although I have medical issues. I earn enough so I don't receive anything from the government except the WfF. But the life isn't easy. Definitely not as easy as my ex who has quite wealthy parents and receives a lot of support from them.
Personally, I prefer the extra payment does not get included, because I do not want to go through negotiations and making agreement regarding educational cost with someone who abused me for a long time.
Having been in both a receiving and paying situation I can comment from both sides on this. I believe that if there was a one set fee for a child and it didn't fluctuate with income these type of issues are negated.